“One must be taught HOW to think and reason, not WHAT to think! It is necessary to be able to perceive multiple points of view in order to navigate, negotiate, make decisions and communicate through life’s many contradictions. We are each uniformly different with similar forces acting upon and within us!” Amanda Venus Abdelrahman
I have noticed that those who are frequently offended and defensive tend to be narrow minded and self focused. The ability to not have an overt emotional reaction, but rather an open attentiveness and responsiveness to the diverse perspectives people have is very important.
Much of our own angst comes from negatively interpreting things which can actually be grounds for relating with and/or guiding others toward positive thought and behavior alternatives, instead of projecting a self righteous need to control them.
Control is in our internal thoughts and behavioral responses, not in externally imposing control onto others (so they do as we think they “should”), which often perpetuates resistance, conflict and negative outcomes.
“Being offended is really a selfish way to treat people. It is a response focused not on the other person, but only on ourselves. It is about what we want them to be. It is about our desire to change them.
The only person in this world that you can change is you. The only way to remove offense from your life is to choose to respond differently.” Jeremy Statton, How to Choose to Not Be Offended
“Being too easily offended is a form of self-victimization. Ouch! What are the symptoms of this mindset, and what can be done about this?
We don’t always recognize an imbalance in our mindset for what it is. We experience the results of it, though, and that’s where we tend to place our focus, which leads us to completely miss the cause. When we miss or ignore the cause of a mindset that doesn’t serve us, effecting a change is darn near impossible. As Albert Einstein said, “No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.” Joyce Shafer, Are You or Anyone You Know Too Easily Offended?